Ladies, meet Alan, a 37-year-old computer science graduate looking for a partner to share his life with. But he doesn’t want just any lady, he’s looking for the ideal woman, and to increase his chances of finding her, he has set up a one page website as a guide for possible candidates. If you can’t find the perfect woman online these days, I guess she doesn’t exist.
Alan describes himself as a “European male born in 1980, 1.89mt tall with pleasant look and a slender/athletic figure,” and, while he doesn’t feel comfortable in being categorized under a specific behavior, he feels that the INFJ personality type (Introversion, Intuition, Feeling, Judging) and the HSP trait (Highly Sensitive Person) can be used to characterize him. He is currently trying to “find his way out of the rat-race” and wants to find his ideal woman to start a life from scratch with. Interested yet?
“In my early 30s, after having had some negative experiences in relationships and still not knowing what I wanted in life, I told myself to start from scratch – listing the things I didn’t want,” Alan told Metro.co.uk. “So, I drafted a short list which I kept updating every year or so until it became an essay.”
So before going into the things Alan’s ideal woman should be, it’s important to talk about the things that she absolutely should not be. Here are the types of women the eligible bachelor does NOT want contacting him, because their relationship just wouldn’t work out:
- Anyone who believes in God
- Anyone who wants kids
- Anyone who is ‘too happy with their current life (which implies that you should start asking yourself some serious questions)’
- Anyone who can’t run, swim, drive a car, ride a bike
- Anyone who doesn’t want to ‘venture to some uninhabited island together for a few months’
- Anyone who is into fashion or is career-focused
Talk about a way of shortlisting candidates, right? Oh, and if that didn’t seem strict enough, you should know that Alan is not looking for someone with a 9-to-5 work schedule. This is his ideal woman, so he wants to spend as much time with her as possible, not just when she gets home from work.
“I wouldn’t be able to accept a relationship with a wage-slave of a 9-to-5. In fact, I will never be able to stand a relationship where I can see my other half only during the nighttime after work,” Alan writes. “I strongly despise employees and the corporate mentality thus it would be an excellent idea to work together, start a business from scratch.”
Alan admits that trying to escape the law of physical attraction is pointless, so while he doesn’t really have a favorite type in women, he does point out that his ideal woman “should not be overweight and should be respectful towards her body, at least trying to eat healthy food and exercising sometimes.” However, looks are definitely not everything, and Alan clarifies that he “obviously couldn’t be together with superficial females who can just think about career, fashion, holidays, owning stuff and have shallow conversations.”
Alan’s ideal woman should be “a free thinker, open minded, free from social constrictions or fake morals and of course a woman who does not believe in any god but in herself and her rational judgement based on empirical, scientific and philosophical knowledge.”
She should also know what ‘cosmic pain’ is and be someone who has “experienced suffering enough to see the meaning of life in depth”. She should also be fluent in English, so I guess mail brides are out of the question.
The list goes on and on, but if you’ve somehow ticked all the boxes so far, I highly encourage you to read Alan’s entire essay on IdealWoman.info. You might just be his.